Fundraising Ideas

“With Christmas just around the corner,” says the press release, “plastic surgery has become one of the most sought-after gifts this year — and the Brazilian Butt Lift tops that list.”

Press release, bah. What this idea needs is an ad campaign. I’m picturing traditional holiday TV spots showing the wife coming outside to find a brand-new car with a big red bow on its roof parked in the driveway.

In an ad for the Brazilian Butt Lift, the thrilled recipient might be shown donning some gay apparel, perhaps a Christmas apron with its bow tied under that which has been lifted.

Or, Mom could be atop a ladder trimming the tree, her family gathered underneath the shadow cast by her hoisted behind. Hosanna in the highest.

Now, all every family needs is a Brazilian Butt Lift fundraiser to cover the expense (expanse?)!